e-news... without Ryan Seacrest.

Ha.

I'm sorry, but HA.

The latest "e-news" from Gymnastics Australia's SMC (which can be found, in all its bright pink glory, here) features the following quote:

WAG E-News is brought to you by the National WAG Gymnastics Sports Management Committee and will provide you with the latest information on what’s happening around Australia and the rest of the World.

I like to think I'm a somewhat modest person, willing to give kudos where it is due.

But come on. I'm a university student, I worked a second job until March, I just completed a thesis, and yet I have done a better job keeping people updated as to what's going on with our team. Heck, I've done it more than once a week on some occasions. And I've never even set foot inside the AIS! I'm not even a committee, I'm just one short, pudgy person! "Latest" information? Your "latest" edition has no Beijing wrap-up or a preview of the upcoming National Clubs championships. Your first edition has been taken off the server. Nice job bringing Nationals back to Melbourne this year, but please don't treat the fans like we're not wanting information. Particularly in this post-Olympic, pre-World Cup period. Does "SMC" really stand for "Snail Mail Communiqué"? Lift your game, folks, we want frequent news updates. We don't want sporadic enthusiasm like some tipsy party-goer who has gobbled too many oysters to win a macho bet, gone and thrown up outside, sat on a bench for a moment to weep and watch his mates siphon vodka into a platter of kiwifruit stolen from the buffet, then come back onto the dance floor with renewed vigour like he had never left, high-fiving all and sundry with an enthusiastic "All riiiiiight! Let's do this!"

With all due respect, SMC friends, if you're going to give the impression that you're constantly "in the know" as the overseers of the national WAG program and all it encapsulates, at least do it right. Two months between drinks does not a news service make.

WAG E-News will be distributed electronically; however we’d like to know how often you’d like to receive it.

!?!?!?
AS OFTEN AS FREAKING NECESSARY, IF YOU IT'S NOT TOO TAXING FOR YOU!